When there’s unanswered questions

Sometimes the question marks loom large over your life, don’t they? Right now there’s lots of question marks for me about the future…

Questions about work.

Questions about our family plans.

Questions about whether we should ttc again or not.

Questions about faith.

And I just don’t really have any of the answers, which feels like an uncomfortable space.

But whenever I open the Bible (which I’ll admit hasn’t been very often lately) I’m reminded that Jesus was perfectly comfortable with questions.

He left plenty of them unanswered & hanging in the air. And often times, He would just answer one question with another – which reassures me that it’s ok to hold space for our own questions too.

Holding space for questions

God isn’t surprised by our questions or our doubts, so we shouldn’t be scared of them either.

Even the disciples, who hung out with Jesus everyday never stopped asking Him questions and struggled with doubts at times. They were learners, always wrestling wit their human instincts and trying to grasp hold of the truth, beyond their limits of their understanding.

So let’s not avoid them or pretend they’re not there. And let’s not be intimidated or ashamed of voicing them out loud sometimes, or feel uncomfortable around anyone else who does either. Let’s not shut them down to quick or just gloss over them with pat and oversimplistic answers.

Let’s be okay with holding some space for our questions, because isn’t this what being a disciple is all about? After all, how else can we learn and grow?

And actually, maybe it’s really only when we start to believe that we’ve got everything boxed off and figured out that we really need to worry…

Childlike curiosity

Right now, my four year old son Ben is constantly asking questions. In fact he is asking questions about questions about questions! And typically, our conversations go something like this:

Ben: “Why did you say that I have to go to bed, mummy?”… Me: “Because its bed time.”

Ben: “But why?”… Me: “Because you have school tomorrow.”

Ben: “But why do I have to go to school tomorrow? … Me: “Because its a school day.”

Ben: “But why mummy?” … Me: “Just because it is!!”

Ben: “But why, mummy?” … Me: “You have to go to school to learn”

Ben: “But why is it a school day tomorrow mummy?” … Me: “It just is!”

Ben: “But why mummy?” … Me: “I don’t know, it just is. Everyone has to go to school tomorrow.”

Ben: “But why mummy? You have to tell me right now!” … Me: “I dont know Ben. I don’t know everything.”

Ben: “Why mummy?”… Me: Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!

But whilst I find myself in these endless, pointless, circular conversations with my four year old a lot lately, it does remind me that children don’t have any reservations about voicing their questions out loud! They will literally ask whatever comes into their head, because this is how they learn about the world

Wondering vs wandering

In her newly launched book called ‘Stay Curious’, which comes out this month, Pastor Stephanie Williams O’Brien writes this: ‘Not all who wonder are lost.’ 

And its an idea I’ve been thinking about a lot.

Wondering is not the same as wandering away, and not all who wonder are lost.

In fact, maybe those questions and wonderings can even be our salvation.

Because sometimes what seems like certainty or sureness in our lives is actually just a form of sneaky bondage or self-deception that can keep us locked down, or boxed into a view that’s far too small to hold the sheer depth and breadth of God’s truth.

And if we think we have all the answers sussed out, chances are that our view of God is too small. Still unsure? Just consider this passage of Scripture for a moment:

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, and neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

(Isaiah 55: 8-9)

So if you have question marks hanging over parts of your life right now which seem kind of unanswerable, don’t be scared to let those question marks linger in the air for a while… 

You may not have all the answers, but you can trust the one who does

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